Results...and an unusually calm Emily

Went to see the doctor at Dana-Farber on Friday. We waited for 2 1/2 hours. I was upset, but I got over it when I realized that he gives each of his patients the time that they need, he doesn't rush. We spent a good 45 minutes with him. I have to be understanding because for all I know, some woman just got diagnosed and needed a little more time with him, like I did when I first went in. Next time I will bring a book or something.

The news wasn't good. The lung nodules grew and the tumors in my hips grew. Now we are changing meds again, this is the last of the hormonal therapy. It's an injection once a month, it's called Faslodex. I will remain on the Lupron (the harpoon). So all my medications are injections now. I don't think that there will be an unsore spot on my ass from now on! Gives a whole new meaning to "pain in the ass"!

I have more scans in November, so if this injection doesn't work, the next step is to start chemo. But it will be chemo in pill form. I won't lose my hair with this, but there is a weird reaction: the palms of my hands and the soles of my feet could become very irritated. For some reason, the chemo accumulates in the thick skin on these 2 areas.

I'm unusually calm upon hearing this news. Recently, I've had this calm feeling deep down, like everything is going to be ok. Don't know how long it will last, but I'm going with it for now.

The doctor said that in cases like mine, where the tumor doesn't respond to hormone therapy when it should, chemo becomes very effective. He's not sure why, but it does. Chemo could become my mixed blessing. Not surprised, I have never done anything like I should, so should I expect anything different from a tumor that is in me?

We talked about removing the original tumor from the breast. He doesn't see the need for it. He doesn't want to put me through unnecessary pain, and the surgery would be invasive. He said that maybe in future, once we get the cancer more manageable, we could do it, but unless it becomes a problem (more so than it is already!!), there's no need. I agree.

He's more convinced now that the nodules in my lungs are breast cancer. If he didn't see any change in them, he would still question, but because they grew along with the hip ones, he thinks that it is the same.